Part 1 of The Revised Nomorims

Here it is. FINALLY! I typed it up…lol. I hope that anybody who reads it likes it. If you have any feed back I’d love to hear it!!!

Blue curtains were pushed back, allowing the sunlight to stream through the window onto the closed eyes of Lady Karstrel de Lunar, the toast of every elvish banquet and ball. The sun gleamed in her silky blonde hair as the maid gently shook her awake and her eyes snapped open.
“Milady, the governess from the human capital is due today.” The maid quivered.
“Ah, yes.”A smug smile crossed her face as she sat up and languidly stretched. Sighing in satisfaction, she glanced at the maid. Her contentment transformed to irritation. “Well, don’t just stand there stupidly! Draw me a bath!” The maid quickly curtsied and shuffled from the room.
“Such incompetence.” The lady muttered. She threw off the bed covers, donned her robe, and glided to her wardrobe. The gowns were all the height of fashion and elegance, such was the privilege of the rich. Her calculating, critical glance slid over every one, dismissing each. She huffed and rang a bell by her bed. A few seconds later a maid scurried in, her head down fearfully.
“What took you so long?” Karstrel demanded. The maid opened her mouth to speak but was cut off, “I have no wish to hear your insipid excuses. I’m paying you to be prompt.Where is my blue gown?” The maid was pierced by icy silver eyes for which the lady was known.
“Mi-milady?” the maid stammered.
“The gown I wore to the Winter Ball.” She tapped her foot impatiently.
“Is it not in your wardrobe, milady?” the servant squeaked.
“If it were, would I have called you?”
“Go, find it!” she barked. The maid curtsied quickly and fled the room. Moments later an older maid entered with the dress in question.
She curtsied, “Milady.”
“Jackie, oh good.” Karstrel approached and examined the gown.
“I knew you would wish to wear it, so I had it pressed for you.” The blue, silky gown was lain on the bed.
“Well done. I was wondering where you were. These other maids are completely unsuitable to wait on me. They have no clue what they are about.”
“Yes, miss. Your bath is ready.” Jackie began to make the bed.
“Excellent.” Karstrel swished out to her bathing room and returned soon there after to be dressed by Jackie. Once the blue dress was on and straightened, Karstrel examined herself carefully. The gown was slimming, the obvious reason for the choice, but there seemed to be more to it than that. It made her look more graceful, cunning and much older than her seventeen years of age.
“Fetch me my barrette.” She commanded. Jackie got the engraved silver barrette from the jewelry box on the vanity. In the middle was a small blue stone, no bigger than a silver coin, but it radiated power. Karstrel loved wearing it because it made her feel like she could own the world. Jackie clipped it into place.
“Good.” Karstrel said. “You may go.”
The maid curtsied, left the room, and walked down the grand staircase into the flurry of activity downstairs. Servants bustled about with trays, vases of fresh flowers, dusters, and various other items in preparation for the governess’ arrival. On Jackie walked, dodging, turning and finally arriving in the Baron’s study. He sat at his desk, making sure that all of the legal documents were in order. He was unsure of the purpose behind this unexpected visit, but he was taking no chances. Governess Laurel was infamous for making noble families become nothing, fading into obscurity. He kept his door open, so that he could approve of the decorations going into the room where she would be staying and the various other arrangements that needed to be finalized. Jackie curtsied in the doorway of his study and waited.
The Baron glanced up and smiled grimly. “I hope she does not look too closely at the Arminda accounts. They are bordering legality according to the new government.” He set the documents aside. “I only saw two frightened maids this morning, Karstrel must be in a good mood.”
“She is…agitated. She is doing the final touches herself.”
“Hmm…” the Baron looked thoughtful. “No harm in that, I suppose. She is wearing it?”
“Yes, Milord.”
“Excellent. That will be all, Jackie, thank you.” And they both returned to their previous business.
By midafternoon everything was ready and the house was quiet. A thick tension had filled the air and seemed to grow with every minute that passed. The Baron remained in his study, responding to correspondence; Karstrel was in the library reading, one of the few things that brought her pleasure; and the servants were whispering and waiting. Due to this unnatural silence, the horses’ footsteps were heard clearly when the carriage was still a half-a-mile out. The groomsmen hurried to their positions and the hive was buzzing once again, for a last minute check. The Baron and his daughter met in the large foyer, to greet their guest.
The minute the governess stepped from her carriage, Karstrel took an instant dislike to her. Governess Laurel worked for the human government, but was not, in fact, human. She was a gnome, bulky and awkward, with corners where there should have been curves and sour expression permanently etched onto her face. Karstrel abhorred those who took no time to take care for their outer appearance. Her hair was in disarray and her dress was rumpled. What an awful first impression!
The governess entered the foyer and stretched her mouth into a grin, which made both of her hosts wince. The Baron bowed and Karstrel curtsied.
“Welcome, Governess, to our home.”
“We’re so glad you could come.” Karstrel added.
“Thank you for allowing me to join you.” Her was like that of a toad, it croaked and squeaked in a vulgar fashion.
Karstrel plastered a smile on her face as the Baron replied, “Nonsense, when we heard of your arrival we were delighted, were we not darling?” he asked, turning to his daughter.
“Indeed. Being a part of the court of the Monarchy for so long has kept me quite sheltered, I fear. I long to know of your system in the East.”
The governess bestowed what would have been a benevolent smile on Karstrel. “Democracy, my dear, is everywhere, including Rivell.”
“Of course, but Queen Marilia tries to shelter her young nobles from it.” The Baron supplied. “She wishes to keep up the semblance of a monarchy even if the Council does rule Rivell.”
“Yes, I know the technical workings of it all, naturally,” Karstrel added, “but you are ON the council and I’m certain that being on the inside is much more exciting.”
Governess Laurel’s frightful smile remained on her face, but she said nothing. An awkward silence descended. For one long moment no one said a word. Then Jackie came down the stairs.
She curtsied. “If it pleases you miss, the governess’ rooms are ready.”
“Well, excellent.” Karstrel clapped her hands together. “Jackie will show you to your rooms madame and she will be waiting on you personally.”
“Thank you. I’ll call you when I’m ready for tea.” They were dismissed as the governess waddled and limped up the stairs. As soon as she was out of sight the Baron and his daughter released their pent-up breath. He patted her shoulder.
“Courage, my love. Courage.”
Three hours later, Karstrel was waiting for a summons for tea. It was two hours after a common tea time and she was utterly frustrated. The governess was ignoring the noble politeness owed to her hosts and that was simply infuriating.
After the governess’ arrival the Baron had retreated into his study with strict orders that no one disturb him unless the governess summoned. Karstrel was in her blue sitting room beginning to write a letter to a friend.
She felt a sort of tension in the air, but ignored it telling her friend of the governess’ impudence and disgusting manner. Slowly the feeling of anxiety grew Until she could no longer ignore it. Then her barrette started to hum. An anxious and weird feeling washed over her, and then the building started to shake. Karstrel unclipped her hair and stared at the small blue stone in the middle of her jewelry. The hum was coming from that stone. She glanced around. The pictures were shaking and then falling, glass shattering everywhere. She screamed and fell to the ground as furniture began sliding and breaking around her. She shakily got up and began to stumble to the door. Her small couch fell in front of the door just as she reached it. She pushed it with all her strength, straining to get it to move, and then it gave way! She ran out the door and continued to run through the mine field of her house. She made a turn and the tone of the stone changed to a more ominous note. Quickly, she turned around and it changed to the note it had been before. Karstrel payed no attention to where she was going, but followed the notes of the song coming from the small gem. The rumbling and shaking of the house came to a pitch and the whole of it exploded in fire and magic. Karstrel fell and darkness came over her.


4 thoughts on “Part 1 of The Revised Nomorims

  1. Dan says:

    WOW. I remember reading this YEARS ago, and while I liked the story then, it was still very rough in description. You have definitely improved your writing skills since then.

    BTW, I am guessing that they don’t have real “mine fields” in your story, so that phrase is kinda out of place. I thought Karstrel wasn’t supposed to know about the power in the stones yet…why is she using it already?


    • karstrel says:

      thanks, I didn’t think about the mine field thing. She doesn’t know consciously how to use the power of the stone, and the stone kind of has a mind of it’s own…so she doesn’t really know how to use it, but the potential is there…


  2. Bri says:

    Wow! Your writing has improved a lot! I like that it has it’s own style now, I always thought your previous works mimicked Tamora Pierce… not that it was a bad thing but this is so much better. I still don’t like Karstrel’s character but I dont think anything is going to change that 😛


    • karstrel says:

      Well, in this part of this version, you’re not supposed to like her character. In fact, you’re supposed to hate it. Despise it. Wish that her selfish little brattiness would be slapped upside the head. That’s the whole idea. lol.


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